I start each day with such high hopes and expectations, but it is not long before my battery lets me know that it has no charge, no energy to carry off my dreams and plans. and so I return to my computer for the companionship at least, of friends.
I could have written these words today. I have two, maybe three days with some energy, and then it drops through the floor. I was just weeping with my husband last night, craving the ability to continue the things so embedded into my soul.
Some days are harder than others.
@WildWomanOfTheWest - I have no one to weep to, so I just soldier on in acceptance of His will. Most days anyway. I get worried when despair threatens to overtake me. Usually I can help it to pass... God helps me get past it. I can't help worrying sometimes though when the day may come that I can not push it away. My motto is always, one day at a time, and tomorrow is another day. I feel like I have so many wasted days though. Thank goodness at least for the computer to give me contact with the world. (((hugs))) to you. At least I don't deal with tornado's and alarm sirens. We are beginning hurricane season here though. At least with hurricanes you get a head start warning. The adrenaline rush isn't quite as severe. Here's to another day for both of us.
I like mornings the best--just me and God. lol Then me and Xanga. Then me and Norma. Then me and Rusty.
lol
I have a dream--of being 80 years old, and being in Hawaii this year and in two years for our 60th wedding anniversary.
Lynn, it is good to have dreams. You batteries are your body and they do run down. lol
frank
no days are wasted when lived for the Lord. even if you spent the entire day sitting in a chair and praying and studying your bible, then that would be a day well spent! if you can't physically "do" stuff, can you still mentally "do " stuff. once when i was laid up for a few months i picked up a book on learning to draw and a sketchbook and spent my days in the recliner drawing. it was time well spent.--karen
Yes, God gets the tears as well. I honestly don't know where any source of hope would come from, if not from Him. He understands me like no other. I'm such a physical doer, these long seasons of fatigue drive me to discouragement some days. The sun is shining. Life is good, regardless.
My non-chronically-ill friends just can't understand why I enjoy xanga and Facebook so much. But that's because they can do all they need to and want to without the physical limits I have. I often feel isolated during the week, though there are times I really appreciate the silence and lack of interaction. Most the time, however, I wish I could do all I used to do. Have you ever read The Spoon Theory ??
@MadraysGarden - The Spoon Theory - Oh yes, thanks to you. I try to share it with people who don't understand. Sometimes they still just don't seem to get it... the fact that this is not something we can 'get control over'. It's so funny how for so many years people told me not to try to control things, but when it comes to this... well, I know you, at least, understand.
Comments (7)
I could have written these words today. I have two, maybe three days with some energy, and then it drops through the floor. I was just weeping with my husband last night, craving the ability to continue the things so embedded into my soul.
Some days are harder than others.
@WildWomanOfTheWest - I have no one to weep to, so I just soldier on in acceptance of His will.
Most days anyway. I get worried when despair threatens to overtake me. Usually I can help it to pass... God helps me get past it. I can't help worrying sometimes though when the day may come that I can not push it away. My motto is always, one day at a time, and tomorrow is another day. 
I feel like I have so many wasted days though. Thank goodness at least for the computer to give me contact with the world. (((hugs))) to you. At least I don't deal with tornado's and alarm sirens. We are beginning hurricane season here though. At least with hurricanes you get a head start warning. The adrenaline rush isn't quite as severe. Here's to another day for both of us.
I like mornings the best--just me and God. lol Then me and Xanga. Then me and Norma. Then me and Rusty.
lol
I have a dream--of being 80 years old, and being in Hawaii this year and in two years for our 60th wedding anniversary.
Lynn, it is good to have dreams. You batteries are your body and they do run down. lol
frank
no days are wasted when lived for the Lord. even if you spent the entire day sitting in a chair and praying and studying your bible, then that would be a day well spent! if you can't physically "do" stuff, can you still mentally "do " stuff. once when i was laid up for a few months i picked up a book on learning to draw and a sketchbook and spent my days in the recliner drawing. it was time well spent.--karen
Yes, God gets the tears as well. I honestly don't know where any source of hope would come from, if not from Him. He understands me like no other. I'm such a physical doer, these long seasons of fatigue drive me to discouragement some days. The sun is shining. Life is good, regardless.
My non-chronically-ill friends just can't understand why I enjoy xanga and Facebook so much. But that's because they can do all they need to and want to without the physical limits I have. I often feel isolated during the week, though there are times I really appreciate the silence and lack of interaction. Most the time, however, I wish I could do all I used to do. Have you ever read The Spoon Theory ??
@MadraysGarden - The Spoon Theory - Oh yes, thanks to you. I try to share it with people who don't understand. Sometimes they still just don't seem to get it... the fact that this is not something we can 'get control over'. It's so funny how for so many years people told me not to try to control things, but when it comes to this... well, I know you, at least, understand.